Our Blind Spots!
In medical parlance, a Blindspot is the point of entry of the optic nerve on the retina, insensitive to light or is an area where a person’s view is obstructed.
But today we are not here to evaluate the anatomy of the eye, rather look a level deeper, beyond the eyes, something related to our mental models, which play a very vital role in shaping our persona and our perceptions.
We all have blind spots, but what we often fail to realize that these very blind spots dictate, and lead us to do, act or indulge in a behavior on a repeated basis with no change in the pattern of behavior, regardless of the outcome.
Mostly because we remain unaware or blinded of our spots.
The term Blind spots were first coined in the JOHARI window, which still stands today as a popular model used to understand the relationship we hold with ourselves and with others. It was created by psychologists Joseph Luft (1916–2014) and Harrington Ingham (1916–1995) in 1955, Luft and Ingham called their Johari Window model ‘Johari’ after combining their first names, Joe and Harrington.
The Blind spot in this given model is an area where our Self is Known to “others”, but remain unknown to self.
This is that part of our personality, even though a critical part of our self, we remain completely unaware of it, and in most cases tend to repeat the pattern of behavior in a similar way bringing in no changes or modification
Few examples of it are ;
- Yelling, or using rude tone during arguments or in a fit of rage
- Using the support of other objects, like a pen, mike or excessive hand movements when addressing a large gathering.
A very common expression for those completely unaware of their behavior often end up listening to comments or feedback like
” Do you even realize how you behaved last night “
, “what are you up-to ” , “Can you explain why you behaved that way ?”
Now, since we have been able to understand a little bit of the concept and what it entails, this brings us to a key question, which is, how do we identify our Blind spots in the first place and then how do we modify it for our betterment .
Identifying Blind spots begins from looking inward, holding a deep and thorough understanding of our inner self, in short, it comes from being more self-aware!
We may spend a considerable amount of time, understanding the world around us, but what we also need to pay attention to is that we need to understand the world within us because our mental models are a blend of our inner and outer world . Within the two, our inner world play a very significant role shaping our approach and thought process, profoundly influencing the way we attempt to understand the outside world.
Next time, whenever you find yourself, receiving feedback on your blind spots and you find it equally confusing to accept it, due to your own unawareness to it.
Consider doing the following to increase one’s self-awareness.
Always Reflect !, set aside time (Me–time) for yourself to reflect on what you experience when you encounter good or bad situations.
Ask Why? when you understand the way you felt, ask why you felt that way.
If you do not get a convincing answer the first time, Go ahead and ask the same (WHY) 3 times more and you will get immense clarity as to why you felt the way you felt, opening up new insights to you about your own self.
Also remember, most of our experience is buried in the past, meaning what we sometimes end up feeling today, has somewhere a deep connection to a past event of our own, and it could be anything, entailing both good or bad experiences.
In short, what we lack today has its roots in something which we seek, never had or had given up in the past.
Learning about yourself is and will always be the first step towards a better you, whoever you might be.
The more you are self-aware, the easier it will be for you to manage, govern and control yourself, and a lot easier to take charge of the outside world.
Just like how (Self defense) is considered the best form of secure defense mechanism, so is self-awareness which shields you from endless confusions, pain, misery, incorrect approaches, wrong perceptions and not to forget your very own blind spots!
To get to learn and experience it, here’s a small grid, very easy to use, and commonly used by Life Coaches during coaching sessions, you can apply this simple tool to any aspect of your Life and become more self-aware.
Do try it!
(Against each Life aspect, put a tick against the column which applies to you and your life, what is listed here is just, for example, you can delete, change and can add your own aspect to the list. Towards the end ,carefully evaluate the grid and you will get a holistic picture of your own needs and wants )
& Don’t want
& Don’t want
This activity is just the beginning as you venture into your inner world .
If you are interested in learning more about Life coaching or understanding your self a little more,
at G&A we run very simple yet effective coaching programs on self-awareness,
both in person and online (virtual) completely at your convenience which you can attend even from your home and that too at the most reasonable cost.
Those interested can sign up here https://goo.gl/forms/iJY6bOFxQfTjH79f2
or write to me at , email@example.com
call me: +91-9177400155
Until next time ,
Mehnaz Amjad (Life Coach)